Help Feed the Burning Heart of Mattopia
Changing the world is no easy task and the difficulties of doing so have caused some, trampled by the incessant wear and tear of daily life, to declare, "The dream is over."
Well, we at MATTAID firmly believe in making dreams come true. To that end, we are the driving force behind the Campaign for a Better Mattopia and we will not back down.
That mantra is the catalyst behind the creation of MATTAID. It is a not-for-profit organization empowered with the directive to raise the exorbitant amount of money required for Mattopia Jones to follow his bliss. And when Mattopia Jones is allowed to follow his bliss... Well, a better Mattopia is the inevitable result.
However, bliss-following, while a noble concept and key to self-fulfillment, is an expensive proposition. That goes double for Mattopia Jones, as he likes to live large. The U2 360° tour juggernaut exploded into a multi-continent phenomenon that threatened the financial stability of the entire republic as Mattopia Jones galavanted around eight countries while following his bliss and the greatest band in the history of both rock and roll. Things snowballed from there. Now, friends, Mattopia is facing a new crisis. During four of the past five years, the good Dr. Jones has blazed through ten countries spanning five continents while following the world's greatest Irish folk quartet.
The situation is dire. The PRM is determined to not ask for a bailout. Instead, it is seeking grass-roots assistance. The time to show your support is NOW!
- MATTAID helps make the magic happen.
- MATTAID provides the funds to follow rock bands and travel around the world.
- MATTAID quenches the thirst for Guinness and Heineken and supports the cultivation of the appreciation of fine wines.
- MATTAID keeps the Mattmobile, a Mattnificent built-to-order MINI Cooper S, running on high octane fuel.
- MATTAID supports the enjoyment of all things "live" (music, theatre, sports, etc.).
- MATTAID funds the discovery process for a potential presidential bid in 20XX (there's so much more to come about this one, true believers!).
In short, MATTAID affords Mattopia Jones the opportunity to maintain a truly balanced life.
MATTAID also supports an outreach program, called Hands Across Mattopia (HAM), for those down times between world tours. HAM works in tandem with the International Committee for a Better Mattopia (ICBM). The committee has agents around the globe seeking out opportunities that might interest Mattopia Jones in his pursuit of world domination.
In short, MATTAID is a campaign of shock and awe. The only possible outcome is catastrophic success.
Help us help you help Mattopia. Give, people! Give 'til it hurts! Show your altruistic spirit and give your all to help this megalomaniac live large. We know you don't want anything in return, but the beautiful thing is you will receive true personal satisfaction from having helped make the magic happen.
Use PayPal for online donations by clicking here:
Finally, be sure to visit the The Irish-Dutch East Mattopia Compagnie for all your Mattopian needs. Wear your allegiance with pride - boxers and thongs are readily available - and help spread the word!
On behalf of the entire People's Republic of Mattopia, thank you.
P.S. - The ICBM is feverishly lobbying to expand Mattopia's global influence by gaining recognition of Mattopia's contributions to the world's economy. The goal is admittance to the annual Economic Summit. Declare your support for the G21 and contact your congressperson TODAY!
Remember: Together, We CAN Build A Better Mattopia!
For those with extra ambition, be sure to check out the Mattopia Times' page on human rights and related organizations.